funny: DC STUDENTS EDUCATED IN THE WORLD OF “BITCHES”

we are all aware that this world is plagued with bitches. i just wasn’t versed in just how many different types of bitches actually exist.

a third grade DC teacher found a carefully written 90 point list of all the different kinds of bitches on her classroom floor and immediately recognized it for the gem it is! reading this list made me giggle and i hope the kids that put this together were laughing while compiling as well.

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found via BLOGUE via I AM NOT LYING

“You’ll notice that according to this taxonomy, there are 90 types of bitches. However, there’s a page missing, so we are left to guess what bitch types 44-58 are…

..This list is fairly neatly written. Spelling and troubled penmanship aside, there are no cross-outs, crumples, stains, etc. This looks like something that was written, maybe as a part of a group, and then placed onto the official record that we see here. I like thinking about an excited group of kids sitting around and charting out all the different types of bitches they can think of and then carefully writing them down onto a master list…”
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i am for sure…
#37 – Same wearing clothes each day bitches
#61 – Tomboy bitches
#68 – Protecting their store bitches (i have a business and i have to protect it)
#67 – Pajamas outside bitches

which ones on the list are you guys? it’s multi-faceted and there is at least one for everyone…

OR you could come up with what bitch types would be 44 – 58

Full page fax print

Full page fax print

Full page fax print

Full page fax print

Full page fax print

my favorites…
#25 – Spanish bitches who think they all that cause of their hair
#26 – Bitches that be ignoring you when they know they can hear you
#27 – Staring in your face bitches
#28 – Big eyed looking bitches
#70 – Ragly braid bitches
#85 – Uncreative bitches
#86 – White bitches that think black people poor

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  • Whitney q;o
    March 10, 2010

    I’m #29, a crazy bitch ! :P :D

  • Phi Hollinger
    March 10, 2010

    #73 – What is slimy girmy?
    this made my morning, hilarious.

  • Ash
    March 10, 2010

    Let’s see, I would be:
    #2 Ain’t got no ass bitch (i’m really thin)
    #26 Bitch that be ignoring you when you know they can hear you (i don’t have time for bs)
    #61 Tomboy bitch
    …possibly a short bitch
    Haha, I really enjoyed this post.

  • Mar
    March 10, 2010

    I AM probably..
    # 25-spanish bitch who think they all that etc- i’m half black so people hate lol
    # 26-life is so much enjoyable that way.

    this was funny and interesting to ponder about..

  • ListenToLeon
    March 10, 2010

    This is some funny shit!!! #26 just made my day!

  • Jay Fingers
    March 10, 2010

    Umm, this is all different types of brilliant.

  • Amber
    March 10, 2010

    24. Short hair bitches
    37. Same wearing clothes each day bitches
    62. Stain on your pants bitches (I just don’t care.)
    Is 76 Geekin’ bitches? Because, if so, that. I’m a geek.

  • Neyna
    March 10, 2010

    #37 – Same wearing clothes each day bitches
    #61 Tomboy bitch
    #70 – Ragly braid bitches
    #72 – Greedy bitches

    HA! This is HIL-LAIR-REE-US!

  • chevycheeks
    March 10, 2010

    this has to be the most descriptive list of bitches ever yeah this def made my day it was alll over my twitter @chevycheeks this is a-ma-zing! thank u for posting

  • Ms_PrettyPretty
    March 10, 2010

    Is this what we do in 3rd grade? lOl
    I can’t lie though; this is FUNNY! And #65 and #72 are me!

  • Monie
    March 10, 2010

    While I’m LMFAO, I still find it super, duper sad that a 3rd grader put this list together!

    With that being said, I’m a one of those…
    Short Bitches
    Can’t Keep A Man Bitches
    Dick Riding Bitches
    Sun Tanning Bitches
    Spanish [looking] bitches who think they all that cause of their hair
    Bitches that be ignoring you when they know they can hear you

  • ZBlock
    March 10, 2010

    I hope who ever created this is getting good grades b/c this is took a whole lotta brain power LOL

  • B.DeniSE
    March 10, 2010

    LMFAO!!
    i used to be “67.big gap bitches” But a yr. of having braces took care of that. hahaaa
    I’m a “61. tomboy bitches” and 89.short bitch.
    and i know some “41. bitches who think they hard” and “79. Triflin bitches” haha!!

  • Nicole
    March 10, 2010

    Lmao Im from DC and this is hilarious and typical, we got all kinds on ‘bitches’ in DC LOL!

  • MarieChucks
    March 10, 2010

    I LOLed at
    “Stanky Fishy Couche Smelling Bitches” & “Wearing shoes that be Talking Bitches.”

    I guess i’m a “Spanish bitch who think they all that” because i’m half Borincana, and definitely a “Pajamas outside” Bitch. :)

  • R@nd!
    March 10, 2010

    LMFAO.. that list is hilarious! but sad that’s it made by a 3rd grader

    I would be 29, 61 and 89.

  • Juliette
    March 10, 2010

    hah that is wayyy to funny :)

  • abgohard
    March 10, 2010

    HAD A SHITTY DAY, UNTIL I REd this post, i appreciate this va$htie

  • Claire
    March 10, 2010

    Damn. They’re spot on for calling out the nappy tender headed bitches.

    I’m def a want to be jocking bitch. what can i say.

  • C@ND!C3
    March 11, 2010

    Haha
    I fit under #76 “geeken bitches”

  • Tiffany
    March 11, 2010

    This made my day…LMAO! Being from D.C. I personally know every type of “bitch” listed…I’m a couple of them lol!

  • NMWELLS
    March 11, 2010

    I HATE SCRAPBOOK MAKIN’ BITCHES!!!! I GUESS CUS IM ONE OF THEM HATING ASS BITCHES!!! HAHAHAHAH…. I. LOVE. IT!!!!!

  • ronni
    March 11, 2010

    i LOVE this, lmao.

    me probably =

    #32 – coast signing bitches
    #41 – bitches who think they hard
    #59 – gay bitches
    #76 – geeken bitches

    can i nominate #47 as “upstate bitches who always in the city” and #51 “bitches from nyc who hate on upstate bitches”? please? thanks.

    :)

  • Joannagenius
    March 11, 2010

    oh im such a
    76. geeken bitch.
    17 bitches who think they better than you (but only when im fresh out of the salon).
    2. Aint Got no ass bitch.
    26. Bitches that be ignoring you when they know they can hear you.

    but aww man they left out the half a coconut bitches – of which i am a proud representer.

  • Hurt
    March 12, 2010

    i didn’t come across the ‘who u callin bitch bitches’

  • Paris-Sophia
    March 13, 2010

    My cousin and I read this and we were hollering laughing. Our favorites include:

    21) pissy bitches
    84) dirty sockwearing bitches
    11) hoche looking bitches
    4) fishy bitches

    LMAO Hilarious, great post Vashtie

  • Tiffany Marie
    March 14, 2010

    Lmaoooooo this is hilarious I’m from DC
    I’m bitch numbers:
    2- aint got no ass bitch
    5-Dont know how to fight bitch
    43-a bitch that goes to a dirty school
    88-tall bitch

    Theplumpenny.blogspot.com

  • Veronica
    March 19, 2010

    The way she breaks it down is impressive – this could be some sort of sociology dissertation of bitches.

  • Chevonne
    April 16, 2010

    I have some more that I would like to add

    91) cant spell bitch!

    92) 10 year old hand writing bitch

  • NMWELLS
    September 20, 2010

    HAD TO SEARCH FOR THIS AND REBLOG!!!!!

  • Robin Nicole
    March 16, 2011

    LOL!! I am reading the list to my co worker cracking up!

    My Favs:

    #12 Aint got no damn sense bitches

    #26 Bitches that be ignoring you when they know they can hear you

    #31 Booty shorts wearing bitches

    #42 Bitches that think they get money

    #85 Uncreative bitches

  • Anonymous
    March 16, 2011

    After reading the BITCH LIST I realize I’m #29 CRAZY BITCH # 61 TOMBOY~ TOMBOYFEMME KIND OF BITCH # 88 TALL BITCH

  • Anonymous
    April 3, 2011

    How about bitches who can’t teach they “ragly”ass kids how to spell?

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