Insecure Insights: #TeamIssa or #LawrenceHive

Every Sunday night my timeline is divided into the #LawrenceHive and what I like to call #MisandryMamis. (#TeamIssa) For those of you who are unaware what misandry means, it’s the dislike of or ingrained prejudice against men.

A quick recap of last season if some of you aren’t riding the Insecure wave. Issa and Lawrence have been together for a few years (five if my memory is correct) during this time they’ve fallen in love, obviously but they’ve fallen even more in comfort. They live together in a cozy little apartment in the hood, neighbors to bloods and sirens. Issa works for a non-profit and Lawrence is introduced to us jobless. For the past four years he’s been “getting his life” and this is no shot at him because I’m sure we’ve all been down in the dumps once or twice. The difference is being down and staying down. Lack of effort creates lack of drive and lack of drive creates catastrophe. When a man feels inconsequential to his spouse, his “manhood” often shrinks at the same rate as his confidence. Which is exactly what is happening. The sex becomes trash and the relationship isn’t what it once was. No one wants to see the person they love fall off their game and get comfortable with laying on the ground.

Issa starts to resent Lawrence because she is also dissatisfied with her life. When in a relationship we look to our partner for ambition, that extra boost of confidence, we look up to our significant other with pride when we’re feeling a little iffy about our own life. Since Lawrence doesn’t have much to look up to and uplift Issa with she begins to question if he is even what she wants. Eventually this pushes Issa into the arms of another man, Daniel. Someone who compared to Lawrence has his life on track. Is Daniel an all around better man than Lawrence? Who’s to say. Old flames, the questioning of “what if?” and the position that Daniel is in is what attracted Issa. Now I’m not justifying Issa’s infidelity, however I understand where it came from.

 

Fast forward to season two, Lawrence finds out about Issa’s “scratch” and they breakup. Lawrence packs his bags and moves in with his seemingly Kappa friend, (if I HAD to guess) Chad. He starts seeing Tasha (a bank teller who shot her shot in season one and got her shot blocked) regularly. They aren’t exclusive, but they’re well involved. Lawrence spends his weekends with her and his daily routine at work and with Chad. Now most men watching this are rooting for Lawrence because he’s smashing a chick with a nice body, but there’s a bigger picture here that most aren’t getting. It’s a common mistake people make which is getting too involved with someone too soon without giving yourself the proper time to heal and grow. Lawrence is obviously still hurt and still cares for his ex. Feelings accumulated over five years don’t evaporate. And it shows when Lawrence goes over to his old apartment to pick up mail and has angry, regretful, seven second sex with Issa. Confused by what it means, it leaves Issa feeling puzzled, but hopeful that their broken relationship is fixable.

To Lawrence this may not necessarily be the case, it’s just something that happened. However, this creates a problem for Tasha who although is not as innocent as she may seem. Knowing Lawrence had a girlfriend before he became available, Tasha should have known what she was getting herself into. Sadly, it flew over her head and I’m sure a lot of women have been Tasha a time or two, that’s how we learn what and what not to do when it comes to men. Being too open and too available to a man and his needs is not the way to go. She is sleeping with, sheltering and cooking for someone who isn’t her man. Why buy the milk when… ya’ll know how it goes!

Surprisingly, Lawrence does something I haven’t seen. He tells Tasha he slept with his ex and of course she gets upset. I’m not sure if he told her out of fear or if he just didn’t care enough to hide it (which is a sign) but if Tasha didn’t see a red flag before she should see one now. Stupidly, she doesn’t because at the end of the episode she asks this fool if he’s hungry. (Which we all know is an open invitation to come inside to eat chicken and shrimp Alfredo) When has a man ever declined a meal? He’s homeless, of course he can eat!

During the previews of next week’s episode, we see Lawrence at Tasha’s family BBQ which was mentioned in episode two. I already know this is going to cause problems for Lawrence and Tasha because when asked if he’s single he answers “I’m dating”, now if that’s the case there is really no business for him being there. You don’t introduce the family to a man who just slides through. Issa begins her “hoe phase”, so I’m eager to see how that goes for her. Every woman’s phase is different but they’re all vital. We learn so much about ourselves during this time and it’s probably the most fun we have in our lives. I hope Issa’s is genuine and not out of anger because anger = danger. It’s not healthy to have sex out of spite, it only leads to regret. We’ll just have to see what happens next.

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Posted in BLOG, CULTURE