*waffle making.

*starbucks drive-thru would be cooler if i actually drove…

*did you say “BUSINESS CLASS”? there’s this hidden club in most airports that caters to the uppity…free food and drinks in a handsome lounge. i felt like i was about to get kicked out for lack of a better pedigree.

*did you say hot dog? oh no, that was just my fat inner self talking again.

*i’m naming my daughter LUFTHANSA and ELLE is naming hers LATISSE.

*i always lose weight when i go to EUROPE…

*SISSY, they use half and half. you so european!